Simulblast! Week 006 Of Spring 2014

Posted on May 20 2014

Simulblast Spring Week 006 2014

The anime is all in the family in this week’s Simulblast! Will sibling relationships be stretched to their limits? Will parents become disappointed? Read on to find out!

This week’s challenge: Know how we asked you to pull in your friends? Well, time to watch anime with your family… aren’t you excited?

Captain Earth (Episode Six)
Player: Bobby Henshin
Class: DJ

Captain Earth

Houston, this is Bobby Henshin, reporting in for episode six of my Captain Earth Simulblast review, over. Roger that Henshin you are clear for review, over. Sorry, I thought it was a funny intro. So, for this Simulblast we were to bring in our family to help us review the episode, so I brought in my cousin Steven, who was the only family member not busy this week. Now, Steven’s knowledge of anime is Dragon Ball Z and Pokemon. That’s it, so it will be fun to see his reaction to a current anime. He also hasn’t seen any of the previous episodes, so this will be even more fun. Let’s get started!

The episode starts out with the Kube, the CEO of the evil-looking business that is helping the Kiltgang get to Earth, visiting Amara and Moco. My cousin’s first reaction to these two was “Why is their hair blue and pink?” If I explained anime hair coloring to him, this review would take forever. Kube helps explain why the Kiltgang are really trying to get to Earth and puts some reassurance into Amara and Moco, also saying that he should be seen like a father to them instead of a CEO. That’s not creepy at all. At Puck’s chamber, Kube explains that, when the Kiltgang get to Earth, with will drain all of the Earth people’s Libido and only leave a select few so Kube and rule them in a Utopian society. When Kube leaves, Amara and Moco make their way to Puck, and we learn their true goal of wanting to absorb all of the humans, including Kube, and just move on from the solar system. Puck described them as space vampires. Steven looked at me with a weirded-out look and asked me what the heck he was looking at. I told him to just go with it and enjoy.

In enters Creepy McJerkface again. We learned his real name, but I don’t think he deserves to be called by his real name. I hate this character that much. He has been given the job of kidnapping Hana and bringing her to Salty Dog headquarters. Steven is going crazy now because he is wondering why Jerkface was talking into a paper cup to no one. Another anime trope that would take way to long to explain. At Globe headquarters, Daichi is practicing on a simulator to fight in space. Hana came to visit him and they take a small break. Hana and Daichi talk about how they first met and who Hana truly is. She is actually an artificial life form created to use the LivLaster. After Steven saw the image of Hana as a little girl, naked in a ball of water, he yelled “I’m done” and stormed out of the room. He’ll be back; I know it.

Returning to Globe, we are met with Daichi’s Uncle from episode one wondering why Daichi hasn’t come home. His Uncle is worried because he is in charge of him and wants to keep him safe. In enters our true hero, Pitz! Okay, I know I’ve spelled it with a Z or an S at the end, but the subtitles keep changing the spelling on me, so the editor can yell at me later. Pitz comes to get Daichi because Hana was taken hostage by Creepy McJerkface. Also, Steven came back and saw the next scene where Jerkface is holding Hana at gun point, aiming at Daichi. Steven yells at me, asking what the heck did he miss. I tried to explain but then said he was done again and walked out. He is more of a sports guy then an anime guy. Daichi summons the LivLaster and points it at Jerkface. Jerkface calls his bluff, saying that Daichi isn’t ready to take someone else’s life. He sends the LivLaster away and throws his boomerang. Jerkface dodges it and asks what the heck he was trying to do. Daichi yells for Hana to duck and the boomerang smacks Jerkface overboard. Jerkface is arrested, and Hana is safe.

That ends episode six. Nothing really to this episode other than explanation and the kidnapping. We have gone three episodes without a robot fight. Come on, anime, that’s what I signed up for! Anyway Steven left so I don’t know what his opinion was. Literally, he left during the end of the episode without me knowing. I don’t think he is going to be an anime fan after this. Well, I will see you all in episode seven, where hopefully we will see some robot action.

Bobby Challenge Successful

Watch Captain Earth on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.

Chaika ~ The Coffin Princess (Episode Six)
Player: Kanashimi
Class: Boss

Chaika Coffin Princess

This week I asked my older brother to join me during this viewing of Chaika ~ The Coffin Princess. I should preface this by saying that my brother isn’t an anime fan by any means. In fact, he often time struggles with my enjoyment of the medium. Ironically enough, he adores movies of all genres, which is rather frustrating when a history buff like him won’t try some of the weird and awkward spins that anime has done. Oh well, I give him a quick rundown of what’s occurred so far, and he looks at me like I’m crazy.

The two Chaika’s finally meet as they begin to exchange them, which honestly is a relief at this point. The red Chaika has tsundere written all over her, and I’d much prefer my white, moe Chaika back. However, the group gets attacked by bird-like monsters due to interference from Leonardo and whoever else works for Alberic. After a bit of smokescreen, the two decide to finish their trade later, much to my dismay.

Please Red Chaika, stop crushing on Toru, you’re making me very upset. Fredrick apparently can drive their vehicle for them so they can get away from their pursuers. As they discuss… is that my PlayStation 3 turning on? Looks like my brother has partially checked out to kick Gandhi’s butt in Civilization Revolution. Anyway, the two theorize that perhaps the emperor had several wives and thus all of these Chaika’s are actually real. Either way, Alberic and the gang are being told to focus on other matters since no one seems to care anymore about Chaika.

Hahaha, the red Chaika insists she’ll pay more if they ditch the white Chaika. Toru obviously isn’t prone to the idea and dismisses this notion. Fredrick seems rather interested in this proposition, wondering why Toru doesn’t accept the red Chaika’s offer considering he would indeed be able to fight more. The red Chaika wants to avenge her father after all, while the white one merely wants to give him a proper burial. Either way, at the exchange, Toru explains the white Chaika is unguarded and needs protecting while the red one is aggressive and distrusting. He simply can’t leave her alone; he wants to work for the Chaika that needs him more.

Ah, but the tables turn! The sniper on red Chaika’s side is about to shoot Akari before she realizes she’s Fredrick in disguise. Behind her, Akari attacks, and a full-blown battle occurs. Before Akari can get her prey, however, she is stopped by falling debris and loses them. Either way, the trio welcomes back Chaika and drives off. Toru comforts Chaika since she seems confused by the fact there’s more than one of her.

Before they get too far, though, they are confronted by the other group that wants the remains. It appears red Chaika is gonna be a pain in the butt. She wants everyone to come along as long as she can kill the other Chaika, which, let’s face it, Toru isn’t gonna let happen. The red Chaika’s group runs away when they’re obviously outmatched by the fact that they’re not protagonist.

Since the episode is over, I ask my brother for any comments; he has surprisingly been watching most of the battle scenes in-between his game. He seems interested in what’s to come next, but obviously I don’t know the answer and can’t tell him why there’s multiple Chaika’s either. Though the most I can gather from him was, “It’s a’right.” Obviously not the most helpful bit of opinion, but hey, it was something. I’m quite intrigued by his reaction if he started watching from the beginning, however…

Kana Challenge Successful

Watch Chaika ~ The Coffin Princess on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Stardust Crusaders (Episode Six)
Player: Elk
Class: DJ

Jojo's Bizarre Adventure Stardust Crusaders

It’s the sixtacular sixth episode of Part 3 of JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure! Before we start I’d like to say I went back and marathon’d all of JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure just so I could refresh my JoJo lore. I had forgotten a great many things about Battle Tendency, or at least some of the stuff in the end. It’s absolutely wild, and I recommend watching it all, as Crunchyroll has all of it up. Nothing beats JoJo in pure campy style. I must say, though, the name changes are absolutely hilarious, and some of the subbing is suspect. So suspect that I, as someone who knows VERY little Japanese, end up correcting lines in my head based off what they’re saying. Things that don’t make sense in the sub that with one word change would make sense. Or things that might make sense regardless but make you facepalm if you know ANY Japanese because of how ridiculous it is. And that carries through to this episode, though I’ll get to that later.

For this episode, I watched it with my dad (who hates all “cartoons” including anime.), one of my brother’s friends who showed up about 5 minutes in, my brother, my mom, and my nephew, Tyler. My nephew can’t talk yet, so he just watched. I made sure he didn’t watch during any violent scenes.

All we get before OP break is a recap of what’s going on, but having seen both previous OPs in my marathon, I have to say Battle Tendency’s was my favorite. It has the most flair, and tells the most story with it’s OP.

Following their standoff with Polnareff, they’ve taken to the sea to get from Hong Kong to Singapore. Joseph is amazed that Jotaro and Kakyoin continue to wear their uniforms despite the hot temperature, and Avdol admires their “Bushido spirit”. Meanwhile, a stowaway is found. I’m immediately reminded of Smokey from Battle Tendency, but there’s something different about this character. They’re threatened with a meeting with the police, and the stowaway jumps off board.

Turns out the waters are shark infested. Whoops! Just before our swimmer is devoured, Star Platinum beats the crap out of the shark. Jotaro jumps in to save the waterlogged youth, and, after some chest groping, we found out she’s got a case of the Yellow. That’s right, the stowaway was a girl the whole time, but the hat she was wearing combined with baggy clothes masked her gender.

Out of nowhere another creature decimates the knocked out shark and heads for Jotaro and the young girl. Kakyoin fishes them out with Heirophant Green, and the girl pulls a knife out because they’re looking at her funny, wondering if she’s the Stand user. Avdol asks her about Dio, but she plays dumb. She also acts so ridiculous that Kakyoin laughs at her.

The captain of the ship, having been notified of a stowaway, comes and grabs her. As this is happening, Jotaro lights up a cigarette, and for some reason this is censored? Japanese censorship is weird. The gross messed up face from the airplane episode was censored too, but that made sense. Anyways, the captain takes the cigarette and puts it out on his hat. JoJo accuses him of being the Stand user, saying he noticed a vein that pops out on a person’s nose if they inhale any cigarette smoke. Everyone but the young girl covers their nose, revealing the captain IS the Stand user.

We find that JoJo had no idea the captain WAS the Stand user; he was planning on bluffing everyone and seeing who would fall for the bluff. The Stand, Dark Blue Moon, jumps from the water and grabs the girl. He explains how he’ll have the upper hand if they fight in the water, and how he’ll lure them in by bringing her with him. But while he’s jumping in. Star Platinum is so fast he beats the stand and grabs the girl from it’s grasp. Everyone mocks the Stand user for being weak, but JoJo still hasn’t brought the stowaway back on board.

Barnacles have appeared on Star Platinum, making it impossible for JoJo to pull her up, or pull his Stand back into himself. He tosses the girl up for Kakyoin to grab as he falls into the water, trapped by Dark Blue Moon. At this point, more of the fake captain’s personality comes out. He keeps calling Jotaro Onii-chan, which is translated as boy. It makes sense from a mocking standpoint, which is what is being done, but it would make so much more sense if he was calling him bro. Regardless, he shows off the power of his Stand, tearing a ship’s propeller up with it’s fins, and creating a whirlpool, sucking Jotaro and Star Platinum into a spiral.

The rest of the team try to have their Stands jump in to save him, but their arms are torn up by fish scale blades in the whirlpool, and they’re forced to pull out. The false captain tries to predict his thought pattern, which seems to be something of a theme that people do in JoJo; though, it makes sense for fighter’s to try and think one step ahead of their opponent, like a type of chess game. However, he’s wrong. They notice JoJo’s gone limp in the whirlpool and are worried. Only his grandfather Joseph thinks this is a good thing.

Once Dark Blue Moon readies an attack, Star Platinum breaks through the barnacle shell with two fingers which extend Dhalsim style and pierces his head. He put all his power into those fingers to have enough strength to pull it off, which is why he went limp. After a parting shot at his enemy, the ship starts exploding. It seems like there were bombs on board. Everyone important makes it onto lifeboats, and the stowaway questions what was going on. Everyone seems to calm down, before the stowaway does a spit take, and they notice a huge ship coming right up on them.

ED Break! Walk like an Egyptian everyone! Parts 1 and 2 both had Roundabout by Yes, though they had different videos, and used different parts of the song. I’m slightly sad they don’t have a similar ED, but Walk like an Egyptian makes so much more sense in the context of Stardust Crusaders.

As for Family reactions, My dad asked a rhetorical question of my brother’s friend “Isn’t this the dumbest s*** you’ve ever seen?” So I think we can all assume he wasn’t much of a fan. My nephew was actually pretty focused on the show when he was around, which is more than I can say for some of the shows on Treehouse (channel aimed towards small children with shows like My Little Pony and Mike the Knight), so perhaps we have a weeaboo in the making? When it comes to my brother, he usually doesn’t like anime, but he does have exceptions. He loves Initial D, and watches it back to back constantly on Netflix, enjoyed Noir and that anime with the kemonomimi cops, but I can’t remember the name of it. Someone help me out in the comments, please. He didn’t seem too enthused about JoJo, though; maybe he’ll give it another chance. My mom, I think, was just in awe of the camp.

Elk Challenge Successful

Watch JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Stardust Crusaders on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.

The Irregular At Magic High School (Episode Six)
Player: Kayarath
Class: Content Provider

The Irregular At Magic High School

Once you take a moment to think about it, attacking an elite magic school is a bad idea since it’s full of magic users who have magic. The students don’t ask where to run, they ask if they have to pull their (magical) punches back. At this point, you’re best off assuming everyone is hardcore awesome until proven otherwise. The Irregular at Magic High School is a lot like love, in that it’s a battlefield. Terrorists have attacked the school, and the students are attacking back. While cool magic fights are happening everywhere, Tastsuya and friends head over to the library, since that that is the real objective. Turns out the open assault was just a diversion so they could steal some classified magic info. After using some super ninja senses, magic, and casual flying, the plot is foiled and the terrorists are sent packing. I guess it’ll take at least six more episodes until something actually challenges Tastsuya.

The second act of this episode is the tragedy of Mibu. Despite being a kendo super star, her lack of magical aptitude has eaten away at her like Zatch Bell in a sushi bar. It ruined her self esteem, caused her to fall in with a bad crowd, and even take up smoking (not really)! Once she realizes the error of her ways, she breaks down and cries. While it is quite sad, Mibu should be able to bounce back in an episode or two. If she can avoid the ire of Miyuki (Tastsuya’s very “protective” sister), she may have a shot of being Tastsuya’s girlfriend.

Tastsuya doesn’t do emotional scenes, so he’s like, “I’ll just go take out the terrorists at their base. How dare they interrupt my peaceful life!?” I have to say, it’s quite a bold move on his part. A bunch of other students want in on the action, so it’s road trip time. I guess the next episode will be storming the bad guy base. As Tastuya enters the car, a familiar face waves hi. Some of the finer plot details are lost on me, but I get the feeling this party has a mole in it. Maybe I won’t have to wait six episodes for Tastsuya to see a difficult situation after all…

Kayarath Challenge Successful

Watch The Irregular at Magic High School on Daisuki or talk about this episode on our forums.

Daimidaler (Episode Six)
Player: Knightshade
Class: DJ


What’s going on, everyone? I’m back again this week watching an anime I swear to god will never be the same now that I’ve watched it with my dad. I mean, the awkwardness after it was over! Well, let’s return to the show that’s full of nothing but question marks, Kenzen Robo Daimidaler episode 6.

We start off this episode actually kind of nicely. We start off with two students on the roof of the school, and it appears that a student named Shouma Ameku confesses his love to a girl named Kiriko Kiyuna. They show some backstory on how they met and how it came to this moment. It was short, but enough that it doesn’t feel like it crammed down our throats. At the moment he confesses his love, Kiriko starts to glow, and the only way for her to stop is if they are touching each other. It’s a nice calming moment, and I like how they opened the show this time.

However, we are rudely awakened by the penguins and their penis tails doing the cha-cha and Ritz just being Ritz. I guess he’s on the big screen and also streaming on everyone’s phones. Apparently the porn district is closing down and someone’s mad about it. We then cut to the big boss of the Barber shop looking at Kiriko’s file, I think. After, that we cut to Kiriko and Shouma again, and Kiriko accepts his offer to be a couple, and the next few minutes are of them going out; not my cup of tea, but it’s a nice break from so much hentai moments. The penguins notice the particles and go after Kiriko, but Shouma intervenes to protect her. The penguins are not impressed. Kiriko then gets excited when she kisses Shouma and gets to use her particle attacks; The penguins aren’t really defeated, but they kind of just leave into the sunset. Kiriko then gets a visit from the administrator, and it is revealed that she used to work for him and is given her pass back.

We then see Ritz and the other penguins planning to bring Kiriko to their base of operations. Wacky antics happen around the school with Shouma, and its just boring perverted stuff. Just then the penguins and Ritz try to take Kiriko away. Kiriko tries to fight back but can’t get excited, and after a “pervert off,” Ritz “wins,” and Shouma grabs Kiriko’s boobs. She knocks out Michael, and the two run away. Kiriko watches Ritz kiss her boyfriend as punishment, and as she is about to have sex with him I think Kiriko says that she was using Shouma to keep her Hi-Ero particles in check. She then says that she really does love him. She then summons her own Daimidaler and is ready to fight the penguins.

Well, when the episode ended my dad had so many questions, one of them being “why am I watching this?” Needless to say he was stumped and is happy he doesn’t have to watch this again. Anyway, the episode was ok until the hentai aspect came back and hit hard. So overall, 5 couples out of 10. It’s been fun, everyone; see you all next week!

This player has paid 10 points the editor due to grammar issues in their summary.

Knightshade Challenge Successful

Watch Daimidaler on Funimation or talk about this episode on our forums.

No Game No Life (Episode Six)
Player: Whiskahs
Class: Technomancer

No Game No Life

In episode six, Sora and Shiro begin their game against Jibril, the Fuguel (Angel-like being) who owns the library from the previous episode. There isn’t a whole lot of chitchat before Sora challenges Jibril for the library. She not only bets the library, but herself as well, while Sora bets the 40,000 eBooks on his tablet. Jibril seems to lust after knowledge, and books from another world appeal to her enough to where her life for them seems like a fair trade.

The game Blank and Jibril end up playing is Shiritori, but with a twist. The participants play around a magical table-like device that manifests the nouns as entities in the room if they are not present, but if they are present, removes them. The participants keep listing off nouns they know until one person is out of nouns or until they are unable to participate because they are incapacitated by whatever things have been manifested by the table. The magic involved seems to make the whole contest take place in a pocket that’s separate from reality, so if someone dies while playing they don’t actually die, and the game simply ends..

After an explosive beginning with ”hyrdogen bomb”, Sora just dicks around for roughly a day by causing the girls’ clothes to disappear and other things roughly inline with the fan service that’s come to be expected of the show. What he does manage to glean from it all, though, is that no one in this particular world has knowledge of atomic theory.

Sora ends up destroying the planet and removing breathable air in an effort to prevent Jibril from responding. Jibril still seems able to respond in this harsh environment using magic, so to wrap up the game Sora ends up having to reply to Jibril with a noun he had written on a piece of paper before the game. The noun he ends up using is “Coulomb force.” Coulomb forces are kind of important, so everything left in the game field is effectively destroyed, leaving both players unable to respond, and making Sora and Shiro the winners.

Jibril doesn’t seem all too bothered by the loss of her library and life and pledges herself to the siblings with a somewhat long-winded speech. Sora ends up allowing her to stay in the library and also gives her access to the books he had bet despite winning, which probably went a long way toward removing any resentment of her loss if she had any.

Aero Challenge Failure

Watch No Game, No Life on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.

Black Bullet (Episode Six)
Player: Midnight
Class: DJ

Black Bullet

Midnight has missed the deadline for this week’s Simulblast. She is considered a No Show and gains no points for writing this week. She has TWO more chances to miss before she is out of the competition!

Midnight No Show

Watch Black Bullet on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.

Week 006 Tally

  1. Bobby Henshin: 610
  2. Kanashimi: 580
  3. Elk: 510
  4. Kayarath: 500
  5. Knightshade: 450
  6. Whiskahs: 420
  7. Midnight: 280
  8. The Editor: 20

Next week’s challenge: Pick an artist that should be doing the theme song and soundtrack for the show as well as explain why.

Make sure to vote for your favorite review below! You can give your favorite an extra 20 points.

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  • nerdwerld May 24, 2014 at 3:07 PM

    I will vote for Elk, although now that I have started watching Chaika thanks to Kana’s reviews I will keep an eye out for her reviews of the episodes. Voting for Elk mostly because of the diversity of the people he got to watch. Also my dad’s reaction would be similar to that of Elk’s dad.

  • Cyruz May 27, 2014 at 9:04 AM

    Going to go with Kana I think, but I liked Kayarath’s as well.

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