Oh, Durarara!!. There’s so much WTFery in this episode that I don’t even know how to go about unpacking it all. I mean…I just…I don’t even know. I’m going to cut this sucker into bite-size pieces and deal with it that way.

Part 1: Namie Gives Mikado The Hand

After her goons were unsuccessful in collecting the Girl With Selty’s Head, Namie is annoyed. But then Mikado gives her a little ringy-dingy on the telly and, because he’s got everything all figured out (remember?), asks for a meet-up. He mentions the Girl with Selty’s Head and Namie, predictably, agrees.

She shows up at the meeting place and Mikado tells her he’ll give her the Girl, but he doesn’t want money. Instead he wants “The Truth” and suggests she turn herself in for all of her nefarious deeds. She giggles at his naivete for a minute, and then mentions Seiji and Mikado has a lightbult moment: this chick is nuts.

He’s understandably pretty peeved about her motivations and tries to lecture her about it, but Namie really isn’t interested. She tells him to stop being so predictable and ignorant and, figuratively, gives him The Hand. Mikado’s stress level skyrockets and he chatters on somemore about how it’s okay to be predictable and ignorant and naive (add pure to the list, thought he doesn’t explicitly say that). As with most speeches made by emphatic young heroes in anime, it was a pretty bad speech.

And then…then he OVER-DRAMATICALLY TEXT MESSAGES (this stuff is straight out of Death Note!)…everybody. Seriously. Everybody.

As people receive the message, they turn from grey zombies into colored-in human beings, which was a nice touch, I think. You could argue that a subtext of this series is the inter-connectedness of the city (and by extension, all people everywhere) via technology as well as random circumstance, and that came through neatly here without being too grossly obvious.

Also: Isaac and Miria are in the crowd, so…can’t fault that!

Part 2: A Stupid Thing That I Hate

After the half-and-half, we shoot backwards in time to when Mikado discovered the internet. That’s sweet. I remember the first time I used the internet (I was 10) and, clearly, the internet is a big force in my life. Everybody loves nostalgia.

Then it gets totally ridiculous. Were you sitting down when you saw this scene? If not, did you fall over? If so, did you throw something at your screen? Did you scream? Cry? Immediately stop watching? I was pretty tempted. I honestly was so annoyed that if I wasn’t blogging this series, I probably would have stopped watching the series right then and there.

UGH. I don’t even want to talk about it!

OK. OK, I’m ready. Here goes…

Mikado created the Dollars. Yep. He made it up online. Why? Thought it would be neat. Yeah. I know. Barf.

I love well-executed, incredible WTF surprise moments in anime. LOVE them. But this? This was neither well-executed nor incredible nor, really, a surprise. This was a straight-out-of-left-field bit of ABSOLUTE NONSENSE that one of the writers (probably an intern) thought would be “edgy.” This was “WTF?!” in a bad, bad way.

I want to find the person responsible for this and spit in his/her eye.

Moving on.

Part 3: Selty and Selty and The Head

Mikado has also masterminded (ugh) the meet-up of Selty and the Girl with Selty’s Head. It’s a short meeting. Selty asks the Girl’s name and when the girl responds, “Selty,” Selty-Without-A-Head freaks out and runs away.

She is later seen monster-rampaging (and TALKING!!!) and giving Namie’s bodyguards the beatings of their sad little lives.

Part 4: Mikado In Mortal Danger – HA! Take THAT!

As the episode closes, a deranged and furious Seiji runs at Mikado with a knife. What, no pens available? Maybe a marker? Such a lack of imagination in today’s youth.

Part 5: In Conclusion

I still maintain that this series feels like it’s winding down. Where can it go at this point? Are we going to follow Mikado as he dominates society a little more? If that happens I promise you I will quit. YUCK AND GROSS.

The only thing left that I care about is a resolution of the Selty/Selty conflict (and I think we all know how that’s going to wrap up) and whatever Izaya still has up his sleeve. He has to have something. I’ve waited so long for him to go insane…come on, Durarara!!! Throw me a frickin’ bone!

Next Time: Being and Non-Being Mutually Exist
Selty decides not to rip her head off the Girl’s neck? Awwwww, shucks.