Welcome, Guest
It seems you're not logged in
You can do that Here
Or Register
91.8 The Fan




Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 06-21-2011, 03:33 AM   #1
littlefileuser
Newbie
 
littlefileuser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 21

Rep Power: 0
littlefileuser is meh
My Sun (original poem)

I was extremely inspired. As you can tell, by nature. I have two other short-quick poems that I'd like to submit so please check them out as well as my first. I'd really want input on these as I've only just begun again to write this crap. Another free verse. You may think this an interesting idea, I sort of do. I want to know if the message is clear and other personal inputs, hm? Sorry for so many posts here guys.
Sparkling, enticing, I want to touch.
Like a star, but impossible to reach.
You're too far away, Pavel, it's difficult to think.
Your undying existence to me, though, is what keeps me with you.

I know you're there,
though I can't see your face.
Your shape, your figure;
I am blinded by the light.
You forbid me to sleep,
You replace the Sun;
It isn't 'til you leave may I am allowed to go.
You lock me in a house, my love, but I am so glad.
If you are my Sun, dear, then I don't need the world's.
I may edit this some more.
______________________


- littlefileuser -


Last edited by littlefileuser; 06-21-2011 at 03:40 AM.
littlefileuser is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2011, 04:03 AM   #2
Leviathan Mist

大好き.
 
Leviathan Mist's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: In a pineapple under the sea
Posts: 632

Rep Power: 107
Leviathan Mist is on a distinguished road
Re: My Sun (original poem)

Nicely done. Who is Pavel?

Also, why haven't you made an intro topic yet in the introductions forum? :o
______________________
This message paid for by the Mist Foundation for a Better Radio Experience, and brought to you in part by Renku.

Leviathan Mist is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2011, 04:49 AM   #3
littlefileuser
Newbie
 
littlefileuser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 21

Rep Power: 0
littlefileuser is meh
Re: My Sun (original poem)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Leviathan Mist View Post
Nicely done. Who is Pavel?

Also, why haven't you made an intro topic yet in the introductions forum? :o
Thank you, and at this time. :) It's 6:44 AM here so I really appreciate this.
and Pavel is my ex-boyfriend's name. We are kind of suffering right now xD but I'm too optimistic to be down. :P
I've made this account long ago; I think I did. But if not was probably because I think the forum wouldn't allow. I'll do it again though since those introductions are always fun. :)
______________________


- littlefileuser -

littlefileuser is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2011, 04:50 AM   #4
EagleEyes

Fanatic
 
EagleEyes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Space Australia
Posts: 1,242

Rep Power: 149
EagleEyes has much to be proud of EagleEyes has much to be proud of EagleEyes has much to be proud of
Re: My Sun (original poem)

Keep them coming!
EagleEyes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2011, 05:09 AM   #5
littlefileuser
Newbie
 
littlefileuser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 21

Rep Power: 0
littlefileuser is meh
Re: My Sun (original poem)

Quote:
Originally Posted by EagleEyes View Post
Keep them coming!
You are too wonderful, thank you for the support :)
______________________


- littlefileuser -

littlefileuser is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
littlefileuser , love , my sun , poem , poetry , review , uyen vo

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:35 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.