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Re: Critique wanted!
Thank you so much for your input, Jubi. When you pointed those out, all of your suggestions were very helpful. I'm glad you enjoyed it, I'm hoping the judges will, as well. The winner gets it published into an anthology and having something published has been a dream of mine.
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<+Cameron> If one of us was Konata, and the other was Kagami, we'd be getting married right now
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