Hey, we were poets and we didn’t even know it!
This week’s challenge: … —?! This week the player can pick which challenge they would rather do. A). Earn 30 points for doing any challenge that has occurred thus far in Simulblast! (please make sure to let the viewers know what challenge you are attempting). B) Gain a 100 points by writing your entire episode review in a poetic structure (haiku, ABAB, limerick, iambic pentameter, your choice!).
Wake Up, Girls! (Episode Seven)
Ah, back in my day I used to emcee at Poetry Slams
Then I was much more into rhyming than I currently am
So if this poem sucks major butts
You can just call me a big klutz
This episode starts with the turmoil from the last
Airi has been told to leave the group and is now an outcast.
The girls don’t know how to respond
Due to the friendly and close bond
Matsuda chews this I-1 producer out
And despite his constant screams and shouts
The president refuses to acknowledge it’s wrong
Oh jeez, this episode’s going to be long…
The girls look to their leader, Nanase, for the answer
But this only gets the drama pot to stir
“What is a leader to do?” She asks
Why does she always have these tasks
After much debate the girls decide
That even if a fired hide
They will protect their friend, Airi
And I hope this I-1 guy will be sorry
Mayu and Nanase leave to retrieve the missing link
And the rest confront I-1 guy in another blink
I-1 guy demands they win a crane game for him
Because he’s a lazy S.O.B. and kinda dim
The others encourage Airi to stay
And no one can keep the tears at bay
When the episode draws to a close
Wake Up, Girls! is reunited against their foes
Emotional and feeling good
I feel a sense of sisterhood
If only every week this occurred
But that would be just absurd
Watch Wake Up, Girls! on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.
Sakura Trick (Episode Seven)
I don’t believe I’ve ever told: watching me try to rhyme is a sight to behold. It is a pain; it’s worse than watching the wrecking of a train. So to you I will spare, so you don’t need to rip out your hair. Instead of making you read something lame, I will write this review like the show is a video game.
So now I’ve picked up the new volume of Sakura Trick. The last game had a awesome school festival mini-game! So far this Yuri game has been a lot of fun. I just wish that it gave you more options to explore the other couples; the story is sort of streamlined to focus you in the direction of Haruka and Yuu. Let’s explore what kind of game play we’re going to get this time.
Oh dear, no wonder the ratings on this one skyrocketed. The first part of the game is all about fan-service! At least that’s what I thought when I started playing. There was all this button mashing when Haruka and Mitsuki are learning how to swim. I’m really bad at button mashing, but you don’t need to do it for too long. I just barely managed to pass it. After that, the plot hit and it hit hard.
Like a wreaking ball out of left field. We get dropped on us Katone’s sister Shinobu, who wants Katone to stay with her. Also we find out that Katone is going to be set up in an arranged marriage. The burdens of being rich huh? In a panic they give us a few options to go with.
-Tell the truth -leave Shizuku -Swimming contest After some rigorous debating, I chose the swimming contest. I mean, just coming out and saying that Shizuku and Katone are a couple could lead to a bad ending! So we begin the swimming contest. The plot dictates that Shizuku can’t swim, so Yuu gives her a paddle board to help her.
Now MORE button mashing. I hate button mashing. I’m not good at it and it hurts my fingers. So after about three restarts and me throwing my controller, Shizuku finally wins the swimming contest against Shinobu. So at least for this volume, Katone and Shizuku get to stay together. That was a close one; they’re my favorite couple so I really don’t want them to come to a “Bad End”. The first part of the game wraps up and we reveal the title for the second part.
Shopping with Yuu. Oh boy, this could either be really fun or really boring depending on the gameplay mechanic and the plot elements they put in this chapter. Yuu-chan wants to buy a scarf. However, it seems that Shizuku has bought the last one.
The challenge of this chapter is getting Yuu the scarf she wants so we can keep her happiness level up. We search the shelf, and there isn’t a single one to be found. Her happiness meter is dropping by the second. We have some options.
-Go to another Store -Ask the attendant Let’s go with, “Ask the Attendant.” The dialogue progresses with Yuu asking the attendant if they have any in the back. It turns out that they do! However right after it’s delivered she finds another scarf she wants. So the entire thing was pointless.
At least her happiness meter is off the charts, and it earns us a kiss reward. This game was sort of short compared to some of the previous installments. I did enjoy the plot elements in the first chapter even if the button mashing mini games got on my nerves. Everyone’s happiness meters are still at max, which will be good when we start up the next disk.
The graphics for this installment were as good as usual, as was the soundtrack. I hope the next time we get more choice events. Everything seemed a little streamlined this time. I’m also still hoping to work a relationship meter for Kaede and Yuzu.
Anyway, that was my review, I hope that it pleased you. I am going to bring this review to and end, but be assured the next one is right around the bend.
Watch Sakura Trick on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.
Gundam Build Fighters (Episode Nineteen)
Gundam Build Fighters The world tournament heats up Episode nineteen How appropriate this day The samurai bares his blade
Dealing with devils But for now we enjoy song OP brings us joy Gunpla’s dark inner secret Please buy more gunpla today
Young American With a deal to get closer Plavsky Particle The woman with two faces Promises that won’t be kept
The Chairman’s great fear Reiji or Sei in focus Girlfriend’s arrival An owner’s daughter owns him Grudgingly accepted fate
Battle approaches Conqueror of Valkyrie He meets with his foe Their memories are faulty He makes a rash decision
Their just hearts in shock Refusal is the only Option left for them A counter challenge is made The victor will have their way
All eyes on the stage Glorious battle erupts Under the full moon The samurai’s sword is keen A beam cannot pierce it’s edge
Risky moves are made Taking to the sword unarmed With RG system The blades cannot match it’s force They shatter under pressure
A secret technique In the past brought victory Now only stalemate Openly she moves two faced Time for repair is given
New arms made post-haste The warrior’s spirit wakes Please shut up woman He makes it on stage at last Glue is their last ditch effort
Manly spirits clash In the hearts of these young boys The final punch thrown Victory for our heroes Renewed spirit from his loss
The Italian And the mysterious girl Will battle next ep Her identity revealed? Next week we might just find out
Watch Gundam Build Fighters on Gundam.Info or talk about this episode on our forums.
Nobunagun (Episode Seven)
Player: Bobby Henshin
Hello everyone and welcome to episode 7 of Nobunagun. We start our episode on the high seas where we find a large old Japanese gunship from World War II. This ship was said to have sank into the ocean while trying to attack America through the Panama Canal. Now this weeks challenge was to ether to make a poem out of this review or do a past challenge we have already had. I am not the poetic type so, I think I will have to do a past challenge… or I could rap it! Yeah, that is not going to happen. I will save you the torture.
So, like I was saying, we start out with the resurrected Japanese gunship called the Misashi. Now I’m not talking about people remaking the ship. I’m talking about the Invansionary Objects making a worm cluster, pulling the ship back together, and using suicide bomber objects as cannon balls. With this new threat continuing to inch along towards the Panama Canal, Sio, as usual, is nerding out over the newly resurrected Misashi and babbling on about how awesome the ship is. They are at a standstill though because their weapons are not able to damage regular objects, just the Invasionary Objects. So Vidocq comes up with a plan to have Nobunagun fire at the bridge until all the Objects guarding that part of the bridge move away and then make a hole big enough to drop the man carrying missile inside. Once inside, Jack and Newton will be sent in to take out the main core of the ship.
Oh yeah, did I forget to mention that that they also found out that the ship is filled with unhatched eggs of Invasionary Objects? So it is their job to destroy the eggs then destroy the core of the ship, sending it to the bottom of the ocean once again. The operation is going smoothly until Sio decided to let her love for military vessels get the best of her, and says that she is going to destroy the core. No one decides to stop her so she plunges right in. Jack and Newton finish destroying all the eggs, and Nobunagun has found the core. Then we are met with the stereotypical cliche of high school girl attacked by tentacles. While being devoured, she sees the bones of The Misashi’s crew strapped to the walls of the engine room. Flashes of images go into her mind about the ship’s departure. She realizes that it is the memories of the ship. She takes good aim and destroys the core, sending the ship back to the bottom of the sea.
That’s it for the review sadly. Nothing really to this episode. Now for the Challenge part of the review. I know I can’t get the poem points, so I am going to do the challenge from the first week of the Simulblast where you had to figure out the ending. Before, I said it might be a tournament style thing like in Shaman King, But I think it’s now just going to end up an all out war with the Objects, and Nobunagun has to kill the mother brain now. Simple and sad, really, but still a good series.
Watch Nobunagun on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.
Log Horizon (Episode Nineteen) Player: Siege Class: Content Provider Episode Nineteen
I missed last week, I’m sorry
But hey, look, haiku
No sign of goblins
Our heroes are now at ease
That won’t last too long
I expect combat
And a lot of it, to boot
Not sure if I’m glad
During the OP
I would like to say to you
“Five more syllables”
I set myself up
To write thirty-plus Haiku
I will not give up
Haiku will leave no room for
The goblins attack
Crusty screws them up badly
Still many to go
Yep, I was correct
Lots and lots of epic fights
Not quite what I want
Are, like, the most boring thing
Someone punch something
Shiroe talks and talks
This is pretty typical
It is getting old
What’s up with blonde kid?
There was a weird friends list thing
That one episode
No, but like legit
I want to know about that
Nevermind these fights
I ordered pizza
It hasn’t shown up here yet
Man, I’m so hungry
Oh, right, anime
Blonde elf chick gives a pep-talk
Yo, you go elf girl
Leading child armies
Wasn’t that in Metal Gear?
And wasn’t it bad?
Sullying the fights
The MMO junk pops up
I’m falling asleep
That girl’s companion
Is an exploding jet dog
Pretty freakin’ sweet
The pizza tracker
It says my pizza’s baking
It’s more intriguing
The Shrieker Echo
Alerts them of the goblins
There are more coming
Talking about their magic
I could not care less
I should subscribe to your stuff
I can’t deal with ads
The kids must keep up
They have to hold out one hour
It’s still not intense
Its started raining
Is the weather that deadly?
They act like it is
Pizza pizza now
Pizza pizza pizza now
Now is the pizza
Back to anime
Minori tries to hold on
(She’s the little girl)
Time is frozen still
Rudy makes a deadly move
This can just go well
Oh wow, here it comes
Spoilers are coming on fast
Skip the next Haiku
SO, RUDY, OKAY?
HE’S A PERSON OF THE LAND
I’M GONNA CRY, MAN
Wow, what a twist there
You should go watch it, for sure
That was pretty good
I’m glad they did that
I was losing faith in this
They’ve got my interest
It’s still pretty sad
But, while avoiding spoilers
I am super pumped.
Watch Log Horizon on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.
Engaged To Unidentified (Episode Seven)
Class: Content Provider
Everyone loves Benio-sama with all their heart and soul
No one can resist Benio’s charisma, being loved by her is Konoha’s goal
Getting close to Benio is what Konoka tries with all her might
Although Benio prefers to hang out with lolis like Mashiro every night
Girls do not like it when someone get in the way of their love
Enter Niko Ono, reporter and now spy, to give her the shove
The protagonist, Kobeni passed her math test with ease
Henceforth, she helped her friends and family study, to avoid a failing spree
Even Mashiro hung out with them, even though she didn’t need to study
Ultizing her magic powers, she gets people to treat her like a buddy
No magic cheats for Hakuya! He wants to pass that test legit
It seems Niko Ono is going overboard on the spying; she doesn’t know when to quit
Doom and gloom befall on Konoha, who fears the plan will be exposed
Ever will she hate herself, should her relationship with Benio be closed
Now Mashiro fears the school; it can get scary after class
There she encounters Konoka, who scares her away real fast
“I will be Benio’s number one!” Konoka likes to rant and rave
Forever will she fail at it, since first borns is what Benio unfaves
I forgot to mention that Konoka and Mashiro share a common race!
Except Hakuya didn’t mention it, he didn’t want to make it a big case
Done with this summary I am! And no major plot points were misplaced!
Watch Engaged To Unidentified on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.
Kill La Kill (Episode Nineteen)
Good evening to any and all, far and near. It’s Knightshade again with an episode you should fear. Things have gone wrong gone amiss and awry. It looks like our heroes’ hopes are going to die. I just realized that this review is going too slow. Let’s stop the small talk and start up the show.
As the Covers start to kidnap and eat all the people, we see the Elite Four not being quite so evil. We see the students try to run with all their might; sadly they get eaten things aren’t looking alright. Satsuki triggers a bomb to allow Ryuko to leave, giving hope for the future, we have to believe.
One month has passed since the Covers took over and to everyone else their doom gets closer. We see the Elite Four have joined up with Nudist Beach, to gain back their freedom which is just out of their reach. Meanwhile, Satsuki has been held captive by Ragyo, who explains that her father none other than Soichiro, had faked his own death, so he could raise Ryuko to put Ragyo in her very own casket.
The Elite Four soon take a stand against the Covers, everyone beaten and no time to recover. Ryuko awakens from her month long slumber; she wakes up super ticked off and cuts all the Covers. In one shot, not even trying, we see a mass clothing graveyard; the life fabric’s dying. She then shows hostility towards Senketsu, her very best friend, she screams she’ll never wear him again, their friendship is dead.
This episode was painful and real hard to watch, the hate level I feel has gone up a notch. I have to see that smug look on Nui’s face again, I’m losing my mind, it’s messing with my zen. Not a bad episode in my humble opinion, I thank you my audience, I’m glad that you listened. An 8 out of 10 what I have given it, I can’t stand this rhyming, not for one more minute. I’m ending this now and with all due respect. Hey can I get my damn paycheck?!
Watch Kill La Kill on Crunchyroll & Daisuki or talk about this episode on our forums.
Nisekoi (Episode Seven)
Player: Zero Gravity
A Haiku Is Hard
Rhyming Is Even Harder
Damn All These Long Names
Tsugumi Hates Me
Three Syllable Names Hate Me
Chitoge Does Too
Pretty Boy Arrives
Acquaintance Of Main Gorilla
Or Is It All Lies?
Claude Sends Spy To Learn More
No Matching Uniform
Meeting Boyfriend Is A Must
Beansprout Come At Once
Tsugumi Gives Bless
Raku Cannot Believe Ears
Boy May Not Be Bad
Tsugumi And Miss
Life Long Friends Always On Mind
Stop Feeding Monkey
Boy Is Annoying
A Bathroom Break Calls For Her
Tsugumi Pulls Gun
Unconvinced of Raku’s Love
Threatens To Kill Him
Raku Fights Him Back
His Words Are Very Mighty
An Act He Regrets
Chitoge Says Stop
Tsugumi Cannot Accept
A Challenge To Duel
Childhood Promise Everywhere
Always Ten Years Ago
Chitoge Conveys Advice
Raku Cannot Lose
Raku Charges Him
Tsugumi Cheats With Boom Stick
Raku On The Run
Raku Quips At Boy
Tsugumi Does Not Take Well
Raku Regrets Quip
Raku Cools Him Off
Jumping From Window To Pool
Do Not Try At Home
Removing His Clothes
Raku Removes Tsugumi’s
Why Does Boy Have Boobs?
Tsugumi Is A Girl To Class
School Girls Are Distraught
Tsugumi Was Named
By Four Eyed Hitman Named Cluade
Claude Is Gender Blind
Raku Calls Her Cute
Chitoge Finds Them Hiding
A Hijinx Ensued
Makes Her Look Like A Real Girl
Tsugumi and Chitoge are old friends. Tsugumi is threatened by Raku’s relationship with Chitoge. Tsugumi discovers her female side, but does she know something Chitoge also has forgotten? One of the things I couldn’t mention with a simple Haiku was my opinions on the episode. I’m happy to say that the original comedy relief is in full swing, with appropriate reactions and sounds to inappropriate situations and faces. Simple scenes, where it looks like a character is screaming is followed by the sound of someone clearly Whispering in your ear. I also want to take a moment and apologize for my absence in the last few weeks, but no more delays! Now that my system is up and running, I’ll be bringing you a review every week, with or without a haiku. But one more for the road.
Nisekoi Is Fun
I Recommend You Watch It
To Enjoy it Yourself
Wait a minute…
Watch Nisekoi on Crunchyroll or talk about this episode on our forums.
Week 007 Tally
- Kanashimi: 2,557
- Midnight: 2,141
- Elk: 2,018
- Bobby Henshin: 1,655
- Siege: 1,450
- Kayarath: 1,410
- Knightshade: 1,360
- Zero Gravity: 880
Next week’s challenge: Watch the episode without sound (or subtitles) and guess what happens. Why? Because we said so!
Make sure to vote for your favorite review below! You can give your favorite an extra 20 points.